Hallehlujah

Life is crazy right now.. It seems like there is no time for everything and I'm here doing nothing but waiting for my planned life to lead me to where I suppose to go. If there is a fate, please guide me well as I'm now as confused as a lost deer in the urban city. As if I'm not worried enough, my uncle kept nagging me in my ear and encouraging me to have everything planned ahead - You should start thinking what type of bottle, what kind of lunch box, what brand of pens you should bring to your future school. Maybe I didn't project my vision far enough or my he worried too much. But seriously, I did considered all above.

A lot of people asked me why a far faraway place? I could have answered them but the question always caught me off guard. I don't have a definite answer in brevity but I could write you a lengthy response in an essay form. It wasn't easy to paraphrase your life and that was a heavy word you know. But ever since I made this decision, which took me one full year to finally went on with it, I consider all possibility just exactly like Alice who thinks five impossible things before breakfast. Yet, recently the impossible of the impossible start building up, block by block and little by little, and now the empire was completed. The impossible thingy are eating up my brain, like what you see in the classic zombie scary movie. Funny, it remind me of the game plants versus zombie, I know I'm going to win in the end but I still live in fear.

Anyway, what I am trying to say is I start questioning and doubting myself lately. I found myself occasionally staring into blank pages, though it's totally normal for me, but it felt different this time - as though I'm decoding something in my brain but always came up with null result. Sometimes, I reflect my olden days and had this goofy smile on my facial expression.. Sigh.. What point of saying this when i couldn't go back to the future, where the time machine only exist in the future?

I went back to my sleepless night routine. Me and my brothers are sharing room and I couldn't sleep with the light on. So what I do is I sleep on the floor with the tall rolling arm chair blocking the fluorescent lamp. I did that every time and I got to stop doing that. Two days ago, I must have slept in an awkward position which caused me a serious neck cramp and an awful backache. My neck had gotten worse the next day and I can't even turn my head sideways. I yelled out in pain whenever I overturn my neck. So I wobbled and bobbed my head slowly instead. Thanks to my twins brother's 5 minutes back massage, I felt a little bit better.

Oh and If you ever get a neck cramp (hopefully you never have to use my method), hot shower bath helps a lot, it felts great too. Basically, what you need to do is to tilted your head slightly and let the running hot stream magically soothes your aching neck. I had to do that though I usually bath with cold water, not to mention M'sia is now 34 degree! I clearly remember M'sia was only 29 degree or so when I'm a little kid. Also, listening to calming music helps to relieve your muscle tension and it helps your body to relax. Unless you got a very serious neck cramp, better go see doctor then. I am sure they going to give you jazz music, pain relieve, acupuncture and massage anyway.

This is the song I've been listening to ever since Lee Dewyze rocks it on the stage! I prefer his live version compared to his studio version. Congratz Lee for becoming the next American Idol, he deserves it! I am looking forward for the next season.

Lee Dewyze - Hallelujah

Jeffy Buckly - Hallelujah w/ lyric